Vasectomy Reversal - A Personal Story
September 28, 2008
Vasectomy Reversal - A Personal Story
by: Roy Thomsitt
This article is a very personal one, but one I wanted to share with you, as there are always tens of thousands of men considering whether to have a vasectomy reversal.
The desire for a vasectomy reversal can come from two main causes: divorce or relationship break up, and a change in financial circumstances that makes having a baby affordable whereas before, at the time of the vasectomy, it may not have been.
Most commonly, men have a vasectomy in marriage, when they or their partner, or both, have decided they do not want any more babies. The reason does not matter, really, the fact is they have the vasectomy because of that particular relationship.
Should a couple make a decision to have no further children then a male vasectomy is the best option. It is a simple outpatient operation. I always compared it to going to the dentist, except you open your legs instead of your mouth. It is also quite painless, although in my case I did not appreciate the painkiller wearing off while I was driving home, after I was assured it was going to be ok. Using the clutch was not a bundle of fun for the last few miles. But the vasectomy was done, as it is commonly every day for thousands of men around the world. At the time, I never gave a thought for vasectomy reversal in the future.
Many years later I was divorced, and it was not long before I was thinking about having the vasectomy reversed. I was in England then, but later in 1998 I decided I would probably move abroad. I eventually decided on the Philippines as the most suitable country that I would settle in the quickest.
In 1999 I started researching vasectomy reversals, but there were not many places in the UK that I could find on the internet at the time. Eventually, I did find one in my own county, Dorset, so I quickly earmarked that for my eventual vasectomy reversal. By that time, I was firmly of the idea I wanted more children.
In July of 2000, I visited the Philippines for 3 weeks to check out a few possible locations to settle in, and to confirm to myself that it would be the best place for me to live. As it turned out, it was way beyond expectations. The beauty, the friendliness, the warmth, the character of the place and the people, all told me that I was going to the best possible place to escape the cold miserable climate of England.
After the visit, I gave myself just 6 weeks to get myself organised, personally, financially, and business wise, to leave England for good. I knew that getting a vasectomy reversal was not likely to be possible in the Philippines, so if ever I was going to have one, it had to be there and then, while still in England.
I fixed the vasectomy reversal operation for just 3 weeks before I left the country. It was a short outpatient visit to a private hospital some 25 miles away. The operation was done under full anaesthetic, and I recall it being a very relaxed sort of day. By then I had sold my car, and had to rely on a taxi to get me to the hospital and collect me. The lady driver was very sympathetic, and actually very supportive, helping to make it more of a day out than a trip to hospital.
The surgeon was making no promises about the success of the vasectomy reversal, and my chances of fathering any more babies. He told me beforehand that he could usually tell, as soon as opening up a man, whether or not he was likely to have sufficient sperm to produce a child. I wondered what chances he thought I had, but I never saw him afterwards to ask.
My next contact with the surgeon was in 2003. I had been in the Philippines 3 years when I met Mary Ann, my wife. Within 6 weeks of our living together, she was pregnant. I was absolutely over the moon, and one of the first people I told was the surgeon. I also passed on my profound thanks for our little miracle, a baby daughter who now brings delight not just to us, but everyone who meets her.
roy@change-direction.com
Baby Clothes - Daywear, Nightwear And Special
September 27, 2008
Baby Clothes - Daywear, Nightwear And Special
by: Roy Thomsitt
When choosing and buying baby clothes, parents can be faced with many choices that, in the baby’s younger days, can seem quite confusing. Striking a balance between practical and cute, fashionable and comfortable, need and impulse, and night and day can all play their part in affecting decisions on what baby clothes to buy, and in what quantity.
All of these difficulties in choosing baby clothes are made worse by the fact that babies grow so quickly. You do not necessarily buy to fit now, but fit for the next few months if at all possible.
When buying the first baby clothes, and even with follow up shopping sprees as the baby grows, it can be helpful to remember a simple division rule, a rule of three. Your baby will basically need three types of clothes: daytime clothes, night wear (or sleepwear), and clothes for going out.
The baby sleepwear will likely outweigh the other categories, as sleeping is what babies spend most of their time doing in the early stages. But how do you decide what numbers to buy of each? Well, that may depend on how often you want to do laundry, but you will soon find a level that suits both your routine and the level of cleanliness and smartness you want for your baby.
Daywear
The clothes you have for your baby to wear around the home should, most of all, be comfortable, easy to access for changing diapers, and simple. These are the clothing articles that your baby will spend most of her time in, so they are bound to get dirty. When the baby dribbles, brings up her milk, crawls around on the floor, or does any of the other messy baby pastimes, these clothes are going to bear the brunt of the soiling. Because of this, you will probably not want your baby to wear her best outfits, such as special gifts, around the home all the time.
The best clothes for day to day needs are probably simple body suits. Onesies is a brand name, but the term has stuck as a description for this type of one piece baby wear. I seem to recall calling them growbags with my first two children, but that was because I am a keen gardener! You will probably need between five and ten of these one piece baby suits to keep on top of daily requirements.
Sleepwear or Nightwear
Baby clothing for sleeping should meet some of the same needs as the daywear, at least in terms of comfort, and accessibility for changing. In fact, if you live in a warm climate, you may be able to get away with using similar clothes night and day. However, if you live in a colder region with colder nights, then a warmer version of the day wear would be needed, or heavier knit pyjamas or similar sleepwear. It is all common sense really, and it will not be long before your baby tells you in no uncertain terms what she is comfortable in, and cannot abide.
Dressing Up For Special Occasions
For outdoor baby wear, the parents have a chance to dress baby up to look smart and nice. This is where some of those baby shower gifts may come into their own, or the baby clothes that have taken your eye at the local department store.
However, these items should still be checked for their practicality, making sure that straps, snaps, bows and so on do not interfere with diaper changing, or cause any discomfort to the baby. You can, though, show off a bit, and it won’t be long before baby wants to dress up to go out. I know our baby daughter delighted in dressing up by the age of one year, and at 20 months now she struts around like a teenage fashion model as she waits to get out the front door.
roy@change-direction.com
Buying Gently Used Baby Clothing
September 27, 2008
Buying Gently Used Baby Clothing
by: Mark Freeman
Remember that adorable outfit you bought for your newborn - the one that cost you nearly $40, and got worn three times before it no longer fit? For such tiny things, baby clothing is expensive - and as fast as babies grow, they seldom see much wear. For parents on a budget, those are potent arguments for cutting costs where you can when dressing baby.
Designer duds for baby DO make sense though - and by designer, I mean the elite in the baby design field: OshKosh and Baby B’Gosh, Carters, Sweat Pea and other top-of-the-line baby clothing manufacturers. They concentrate on the little details that cheap clothing manufacturers skimp on - little details that make a major difference in fit, appearance and comfort. You want to take advantage of nice, flat seams that don’t irritate, and nylon snaps that don’t scratch or pull through fabric. But you don’t want to pay $30 for a sleeper!
The answer is shopping around for gently worn using baby clothes and checking with friends and relatives for outgrown hand-me-downs. Yard sales are a great source in the spring and summer months. You’ll often find great clothes that are barely worn in sizes for the next couple of years. Check the newspaper for upcoming yard sales - baby clothes are often one of the advertised items.
Another great place to buy designer baby clothes at rock-bottom prices is a good consignment shop. Strike up a relationship with the owner, and she may even put aside items that she knows you’ll love and give you a call to let you know what she’s got. In addition, you can often sell the same baby clothes BACK, or trade them in on the next size up when baby outgrows them.
How about a place to get gently used baby clothing for the cost of the gas to go pick them up? Freecycle.org is a national movement of community bulletin boards who are committed to the concept of ‘one man’s junk’. Check http://www.freecycle.org to see if there’s a chapter near you, and join up. Seldom a day goes by that someone doesn’t offer a few bags of baby and children’s clothing in various sizes. The quality varies, but the younger the baby, the more likely that the clothing is still in excellent shape.
Don’t overlook church and community thrift shops as sources of good, well-cared for baby clothing. If there’s a Junior League thrift shop in your city, you’ll find beautiful clothing for baby at bargain basement prices.
When you do pick up used clothing for baby, launder it as soon as you get it home. Pretreat stains if there are any, and wash with a gentle laundry soap meant for baby. Add borax to the water for extra whitening power, and be sure to rinse at least twice if you use bleach. By the time you’re done, you’ll have one of the best-dressed babies in town - without breaking your piggy bank.
support@arundel.net
The Effects of Televised Sexual Content on Adolescents
September 26, 2008
The Effects of Televised Sexual Content on Adolescents
by: Brent Sitton
According to a September 2004 study by the RAND Corporation, “Adolescents who watch large amounts of television containing sexual content are twice as likely to begin engaging in sexual intercourse in the following year as their peers who watch little such TV.” In addition, the National Institutes of Health-funded study found that these children’s sexual behavior was akin to those adolescents who were 9 to 17 months older, but who watched only average amounts of TV with sexual content. “Television habits predicted whether adolescents went to ’second or third base,’ as well as whether they had sex for the first time,” said Rebecca Collins, a RAND psychologist who led the study. “The 12-year-olds who watched a lot of television with sexual content behaved like the 14- or 15-years-olds who watched the least amount of sexual television. The advancement in sexual behavior we saw among kids who watched a lot of sexual television was striking.” This alarming trend occurs within the context of ever-increasing amounts of implicit and over sexual content on television. As reported by the Parents Television Council, “In a sample of programming from the 2001-2002 TV season, sexual content appeared in 64% of all TV programs. Those programs with sexually related material had an average of 4.4 scenes per hour. Talk of sex is more frequent (61%) vs. overt portrayals (32%). One out of every 7 programs includes a portrayal of sexual intercourse.” According to the RAND study, talk of sex had just as much of an effect on adolescent sexual behavior as overt behaviors. Sexual behavior among U.S. teens is on the rise. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 46% of all high school students have had sexual intercourse. The National Institutes of Health has found that, each year, one of every four sexual active teens contracts a sexually transmitted disease. Teen pregnancy in the U.S. is also the highest among industrialized nations. Now, more than ever, parents need to be concerned about what their children are watching on television. The first step parents need to take is to monitor the content of the shows their adolescents watch. According to RAND researcher Collins, “The impact of television viewing is so large that even a moderate shift in the sexual content of adolescent TV watching could have a substantial effect on their sexual behavior.”
Other important steps you can take to curb or mitigate your children’s exposure to sexual content on television include:
Watch TV with your children and discuss your beliefs about sex and about the sexual behaviors portrayed on TV.
Develop TV-watching guidelines for your children and enforce them.
Limit the amount of time your children watch TV. Instead, use family movie reviews to rent movies with appropriate content.
Encourage and reward your children for reading instead of watching TV.
Encourage your children to find and develop non-television related hobbies and interests.
By taking these simple steps, you can help to ensure that your adolescents’ attitudes and beliefs about sex more closely mirror your own, and that their sexual initiation is delayed.
bsitton@discoveryjourney.com
How To Avoid Post Partum Depression
September 25, 2008
How To Avoid Post Partum Depression
by: Moss Greene
New mothers sometimes experience “postpartum blues.” This is understandable. Pregnancy and birth are very dramatic events for your body - both physically and emotionally. So, it’s common to feel a little weepy, irritable or moody in the first few days after birth.
If you eat well, supplement your diet with high quality whole food supplements (especially omega-3 oils and B vitamins) and get enough rest, mild cases should pass quickly.
But, if “the blues” continue for more than just a few days, or if you’re feeling really depressed and down, please don’t try to tough it out. Get professional help. Ask your midwife or doctor to connect you with someone who can give you appropriate counseling.
Here are some tips that can help prevent or ease the symptoms of postpartum depression:
1. Ask for help after the birth. Here are some things friends and family could do for you during the first few weeks that might work better than giving the traditional baby shower gifts. They can:
- Bring you a complete dinner (hot and ready to serve);
- Volunteer to do your laundry;
- Take care of your house cleaning;
- And/or entertain older children with a day of play.
2. Get yourself out of the house - if only onto the deck or front steps - for at least a few minutes each day. Set up a lawn chair, wrap up yourself and your baby in a blanket and take a break. Set aside this time for you and baby.
3. Take it easy. Play with your baby. Visit with friends and family. Listen to relaxing music. Watch some old “feel good” DVD’s. Get someone to take you and baby for a long ride in the car. Baby will probably fall right off to sleep and you’ll get a chance to shut your eyes and relax for a few moments too.
4. And most importantly, eat really well and get yourself on a complete whole food nutritional program including pure omega-3 oils with EPA and DHA. I’ve seen high quality whole food supplements, combined with wholesome eating, consistently succeed in overcoming postpartum depression.
This is a special time for both you and your baby. It’s important to relax and enjoy it. And remember, if your depression continues for more than a few days, please don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask for help. Support is only a phone call away at the National Post Partum Depression Hotline 1-800-PPD-MOMS (773-6667).
