10 Universal Laws for Parents of Teens
April 30, 2006
1 “Law of Belonging”: The greatest need of teenagers (after music and the phone) is a strong sense of belonging. They need to feel they are a part of something bigger than themselves. If they don’t get it in a healthy place - with family, worthwhile friends, clubs, sports, youth groups, etc. - they will get it in an unhealthy place - with inappropriate friends, drugs, gangs or cults.
2 “Law of Hope”: Recent statistics show that one of the age groups in which the suicide rate is rising is adolescents. This is the direct result of a lack of hope - hope for the future, hope that things will get better.
3 “Law of Power”: Once you enter into a power struggle with a teen, you have already lost it. Remember the closing line of the movie War Games: “Interesting game . . . the only winning move is not to play.”
4 “Law of Management”: A management approach to raising teens puts parents clearly in charge. The goal is to manage them eventually out of your lives and into their own. Parenting is one of those jobs in which the goal is to eliminate the need for your job.
5 “Law of Modeling”: If you don’t want your teen doing something, make sure you are not doing it yourself. Teens have very strong and sensitive hypocrisy meters and are eager to use them.
6 “Law of Differing Views”: It’s no great insight that parents and teens view the world in different ways. One clear example of this is school. For parents, the view is we work all day, kids don’t. School is their job. Therefore, they should get good grades. The view of teenagers can be that school is right in the middle of their important social world.
7 “Law of Punishment”: Punishment often springs from anger. Punishment breeds resentment and a desire for revenge. Teens have many creative ways to retaliate.
8 “Law of Consequences”: Consequences teach teens about the real world. In general, consequences need to be reasonable, respectful, swift and strong enough to get the attention of teens.
9 “Law of Structure”: Parents need to set boundaries and structure from day one. If you don’t do this while they are young, what makes you think they will obey a curfew once they have a car? We tend to over structure the time of young children and understructure the time of teens. Teenagers need structure as much, if not more, than younger children.
10 “Law of W’s”: When teens are away from home, parents need to know who they are with, where they are, what they are doing, and what time they will be back.
Jeff Herring, MS, LMFT, is a marriage and family therapist specializing in working with teenagers and their parents. A nationally syndicated relationship columnist and speaker, Jeff is also the founder and CEO of http://www.ParentingYourTeenager.com, where you can subscribe to his f’ree internet newsletter “ParentingYourTeenager.” E-mail Jeff at jeff@parentingyourteenager.com
Anti-Aging Skin Care Treatment, Products and Tips
April 30, 2006
Why to let people know your age when you can keep them guessing? But shedding off years from your appreance isnt always a piece of cake. At times, it can present a picture where you are trying a bit too hard which you should avoid. But there are some magic tips which you can always use to hide your age
1) Give special attention to neck while moisturising your face. Neck reflects your age.
2) Regularly follow a routine of cleansing, toning and moisturising your skin.
3) Frame your face well with layers instead of keeping it all in one length while getting a haircut for yourself.
4) Dont apply too much of make-up. It echoes your frustration related to your ageing skin.
5) Always go in for cream-based cheek color over powdered one.
6) Caramels, dusty pinks topped with gloss make make the lips much younger.
7) Avoid brown, deep mauves, matte reds.
8) For those with glasses, opt in for coloured plastic glasses rather than metal frames.
9) Choose from grey or brown eyeliners. NO BLACK EYELINERS.
10) Fringes and bangs look very cute and throws you into your earlier times.
11) Take special care of your eyebrows. Its very important in taking off years from your face. Go for a medium thick brow that looks like it’s naturally in good shape.
12) Most important of all, Quit Smoking right now. It infacts make you look much older than you are. Get some Quit Smoking painlessly: Effective Tips at http://www.weightloss-health.com/quit_smoking_ways.htm
THE IDEA IS TO PAMPER YOURSELF WITH THESE ANTI-AGEING TIPS which can really do wonders for you.
About the Author:
Jasdeep
For http://weightloss-health.com/ your complete and most comprehensive family guide on Health.
Also get free tips and tricks on Skin Care and a chance to go through other informative articles targetting various health issues at Skin Care Tips and Products
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Using Bread Machine Mixes in Your Oven
April 30, 2006
You don’t have to own a bread machine to enjoy the variety of bread machine mixes. And you don’t have to make blocky, square loaves with holes in the bottom. You can make wonderful rolls, traditional sandwich loaves, and artisan loaves with or without the aid of a bread machine. In this article, we will tell you how to convert any bread machine mix into great breads by hand, with your stand-type mixer, or with your bread machine.
First, we’ll show you how to bake tempting breads from bread machine mixes without a bread machine. We’ll use our Sour Cream Onion Bread Mixes because we like this onion bread so much (and we get to enjoy it when we�re through with this demonstration). We like to make more than one loaf when we bake so we’ll use two mixes and combine them. (When we have more bread than we can use, we slice and freeze it.) We’ll mix these in a bowl instead of using our stand-type mixer and bake one in a pan and make one into a classy artisan loaf just to demonstrate versatility.
To mix in a bowl, empty the mixes into a large bowl. Mix the yeast in the warm water and add the mixture to the bowl. Add melted butter. (Be careful to let the butter cool below 140 degrees so that it will not kill the yeast.) Stir with a spatula until the mass starts to stick together. When you cannot comfortably stir any further, dump the dough onto a floured surface and begin kneading. (The dough will likely be slightly wetter than you can handle by hand. A tablespoon or so of flour on the counter should make it just right. Do not add too much flour–a softer dough will rise better.) Knead the dough until it is elastic–ten to twelve minutes. Place it in a greased bowl, cover it, and let it rise until doubled–about an hour.
To mix using a stand-type mixer, empty one of the mixes into the mixer bowl (or half of one mix if you are baking a single loaf). Add the yeast and the water and mix with your dough hook on medium speed for 40 seconds–to start to dissolve the yeast. Add the other mix (or the rest of the mix if you are baking one loaf) and the melted butter and continue mixing at medium speed for another four minutes to develop the gluten. If the dough is too sticky, add one tablespoon flour. Place the dough in a greased bowl, cover it and let it rise until doubled–about an hour.
Once the dough has risen, you may form the dough into rolls, a pan-shaped loaf, or a free-standing loaf.
To form a free-standing loaf, pull the dough around the center creating a taut outer skin and a well-shaped loaf. Pinch the seams together on the bottom and place the loaf on a baking sheet that has been greased and sprinkled with cornmeal. Cover the loaf and let it rise until doubled–about an hour.
To form a pan-shaped loaf, pull the dough around the center to form a taut skin and place the loaf in a large greased 5 x 9-inch loaf pan. Cover and let rise.
To form rolls, cut away egg-sized chunks of the risen dough and pull the dough taut around the center of the roll as you would a loaf, pinching the seam on the bottom. Place the rolls on a greased pan, cover, and let rise. One bread machine mix should make a dozen medium-sized rolls.
Most artisan loaves are baked with a thicker, chewier crust than pan-shaped loaves. To create these crusts, the bread is baked in a steamy environment and it is baked to a higher internal temperature in order to drive more moisture from the loaf. (Moisture trapped in the interior of the loaf will migrate to the crust and soften it.) The internal temperature of crusty breads should reach 210 degrees. If you would like to bake a crusty, artisan bread, click here for instructions.
Bake the pan-shaped loaf at 350 degrees for 30 minutes or until done. The interior of the loaf should be at least 190 degrees.
Bake rolls for 18 to 20 minutes at 350 degrees or until done.
If you would like to try baking these great breads from our Bread Machine Mixes, you can do so for as little as $2.04 per mix.
Baking Hint: The bronze finish that you see on the loaves in this picture was created with an egg yolk wash. Simply mix one tablespoon warm water with one egg yolk and gently brush the wash on the loaf just before baking.
For more articles like this visit The Baker’s Library.
© 2004 The Prepared Pantry
And How Do We Feel This Morning?
April 30, 2006
Without question, going to the hospital is teamwork from the time you arrive until you are wheeled out the front door. Everyone is working together for the common good of the patient, or at least a crack at his bank account. That is as it should be in such mercenary endeavors.
Spending a few days in the hospital recently reinforced this in my own mind. Although my time in the hospital was brief, I was given the full treatment.
The hospital staff left no bed unturned in the holy quest of my recuperation. No matter what time of night it was, each nurse cooperated in awakening me and asking, “And how do we feel tonight?”
Teamwork is good for a number of things in life. Peanut butter and jelly, ham and eggs, and bologna and cheese are a few things benefiting from cooperation. In each example, one element compliments the other and the combination is greater than each individual part. This is coordination at it finest.
There is a limitation to the so-called cooperation, especially in the environment of the hospital. I don’t want to complain, but now that I am out, I feel a little freer expressing my opinion, without fear of any needling from the hospital staff.
I will grant you, nurses are some of the most wonderful people in the world. The job they do is simply marvelous. It is absolutely true that patients could not get along without these nurses.
On the other hand, what would these nurses do without patients?
I don’t want to brag here, but if it were not for patients like me (if there are patients like me), nurses would not have a single thing to do in the hospital. Essentially, they owe their job to me. The level of their significance is in direct proportion to the patients they serve.
Not one to belabor a point, (it’s hard to do any labor in my condition right now) I think it’s about time someone stood up for patient rights. Since I have nothing to do for the next week except recuperate here at home, I am the perfect person to say something about this crucial issue.
The major complaint I have is with the “we-disease” rampant in hospitals across the nation. This “we-disease” syndrome has gotten out of hand and despite all the research, no cure seems looming in the hospital corridors.
Every morning, around 5 o’clock, my nurse came bouncing into my room with the cheeriest of dispositions, completely disregarding my condition at hand and boldly asked, “And how do we feel this morning?”
Even on my best day, 5 o’clock in the morning is not a good time to ask me any question, especially how I’m feeling. If there were any chance that I was feeling good, I certainly would not be in the hospital.
The thing most disturbing to me is the sense on the part of the nurse to personally identify with my pain. Hence, “And how do we feel this morning?”
I object to this vehemently. It is my pain, not “our” pain. I believe each nurse should go and get their own pain. I’m paying a lot for this pain and I deserve all the credit. I do not choose to share my pain with anyone, especially someone with a bubbly orientation so early in the morning.
It’s my ailment and I have the right to not only enjoy it but also tell everyone about it. One reason it’s so hard to tell people about my ailment is everybody wants to tell me about their own ailments instead.
My hospital room that I’m paying for should be the one place I can indulge my ailment. I should not have to compete with nurses concerning my prevailing ailment. From a casual perusal of medical journals while waiting in the doctor’s office, there are more than enough ailments to go around.
This is my ailment and I share it with no person, especially healthy nurses wielding needles and pain pills.
If I hear that phrase, “And how do we feel this morning?” one more time I’m going to throw some business to my favorite funeral home.
A related phrase brought just as much frustration. My good nurse came in one morning and quipped, “And are we having our breakfast this morning?”
Looking at the breakfast tray before me, with barely enough for me, I simply glared at her. If she had any designs of slicing in on my breakfast, blood would flow. I gripped my plastic knife menacingly.
This whole thing came to a head my last morning in the hospital. My evanescent nurse burst into my room and asked, “And are we ready for our bath this morning?” This was the straw that sipped the last drop of patience from my languishing body.
Nothing is more personal to me then “my” bath. I will share my tub with nobody except my rubber ducky.
Getting rest in the hospital is a challenge for the weariest soul. Just when you think you have snuggled down for a snooze, someone asks how you are.
The best rest comes from Jesus Christ who invites everyone to “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30 KJV.)
His inquiry is always welcome and comes at the right time, like now.
Reverend Snyder is currently ministering at the “Family of God Fellowship” in Ocala, Florida. More of his articles are available for reprint at his website: http://www.godspenman.com/ Rev. Snyder is available as a guest speaker. He writes a weekly column and is the author of “Romance Around a Parsonage Fireplace” available at: http://www.jamessnyderministries.com/
Kitchen Remodeling Costs
April 30, 2006
It is important to prepare a budget for your kitchen remodeling plan before you start implementing it. Without a complete and detailed budget prepared before the kitchen renovation begins, you may get swept into a spending spiral of unbudgeted extras.
Limit spending on the kitchen remodeling to about 15-percent of your home’s value.
Be well informed about the cost of each component in your remodeling plan. Surf the Internet, gather product literature, bug friends who’ve remodeled, read, ask questions and make phone calls. Do everything you can to be informed. The more you know, the better you’ll be able to make wise choices.
The cost of appliances, countertops, cabinets, flooring, and so on, will add up to one-half to two-thirds of the total cost of remodeling. Find out the prices for these items and plug those figures into the budget. Similarly, make provisions for the cost of labor, design, contracting services, and permit fees.
The best way to list the items required for remodeling is to write down everything that’s installed in your existing kitchen. Visit appliance stores and ask questions to the sales staff. Meet local kitchen design centers, and ask them for samples of work they’ve done and inquire about the cost. A professional will be able to give out details that you might forget.
For a kitchen measuring about 10×12 feet, a cosmetic kitchen upgrade can cost around $2,750 in products, which include new cabinet doors, laminate countertops, vinyl flooring, a stainless-steel sink and a chrome faucet.
If you want to go for higher-grade hardwood cabinets, ceramic tile countertops and flooring, a coated-steel sink, a faucet with pullout head, new appliances and track lighting, the cost might be in the range of $7,000 to $7,500.
A kitchen with semi-custom cabinets, laminate or ceramic tile flooring, a cast-iron sink, a designer faucet, better appliances, canister lighting and granite or solid-surfacing countertops could cost up to $16,500.
Kitchen Remodeling Info provides detailed information about kitchen remodeling ideas and costs, including small kitchen remodeling ideas, kitchen cabinet remodeling, and more. Kitchen Remodeling Info is the sister site of Bathroom Remodeling Web.
The Great Baby Name Debate
April 30, 2006
Winifred or Willow? Thomas or Troy? The name you choose for your child will last a lifetime. Whether you’re looking for something original that will stand out from the crowd or a traditional name that people will instantly recognize, choosing a name for your new baby is a huge responsibility.
It goes without saying that you as the parents must like the name. Names that hold bad associations for you are out (Jeremy was a bore at school, you can’t stand Bella in the Tweenies), and if you consider your own name uninteresting, you may wish to choose something more exotic - or vice versa.
Think carefully about combinations of first name and surname. Are they compatible? You may like a mixture of an unusual first name with a more familiar surname (Zara Phillips), but be careful about rhyming the two names - Mark Clarke won’t thank you for it. Beware initials that could cause hilarity to your child’s future friends - Ethan Thomas or Peter Oliver Ogilvie won’t be joining in the giggles! Trying to be clever can also cause grief - Poppy Fields or Summer Winters may sound cute at the time, but can eventually grate on everyone’s nerves!
If she’s called Grace, will she turn out to be butter-fingered? Will Maximus grow into a Mr. Puniverse? Is Jordan a boy or a girl? What will Elizabeth grow up as? Lizzie? Beth? Liza? And as for Ashleigh, Ashley, Ashlee, Ashlea and Ashlie - all in circulation at the moment - how is anyone supposed to find a name that is both special and appropriate?
Fortunately, sources of inspiration can be found everywhere. You can avoid the throng of Chloes, Emilys, Jacobs and Jacks topping the baby name charts for the past few years, and choose from a huge variety of names collected in specialist books and on the Internet. Some parents prefer biblical names - Rebecca, Abigail, Joshua, Samuel and Joseph are all very popular at the moment. Names inspired by nature include Blossom, Lily or Skye and even Tiger for boys. Place names (Paris, Lamorna), colours (Coral, Ebony), astronomy, music, and sport - all provide a wealth of ideas and choice.
Naming twins presents its own set of challenges. You may wish to link the names in some way using the same first letter (Jack and Jill?) or a theme such as Liberty and Faith, or even similar names like Leo and Eleonora. However, you might end up having two very independent children who don’t wish to be connected by name as well as birthday. A less obvious connection involves using different names with similar meanings such as Columba and Jemima (both meaning dove), or Jonathan and Matthew (gift of God).
For those of us who still haven’t decided even when the stork delivers, the arrival of your newborn may give you all the inspiration you need! Christmas babies often appear as Noel or Noelle, Natalie or Natasha, nighttime births produce star inspired names such as Stella, Esther or Sterling, and for thankful parents after a difficult birth, Nathaniel (gift of God), Abigail (father’s joy) or Miranda (wonderful) might fit the bill.
So whether you plump for Clifford or Condor, Harriet or Harmony, have fun choosing that special name - and with careful thought, your child will grow up bearing a name you can all be proud of!
Claire Kolarova is a busy mother, teacher and webmaster of http://www.littlekidsgamesonline.com, where you can also find baby shower game ideas and resources.
